family, pastor's wife, teachers, Uncategorized

Tame That Tongue!

What a great time we had in Philadelphia last weekend!  The Party of Six weathered the rain storm on Thursday night to make our way up to celebrate with my sister, brother in law, and nephew as they were being installed at their new church. 

My brother in law, James, and my sister in her first "First Lady" hat. Doesn't she look great?!

We had planned to catch a little sightseeing in between church activities, but as always, things didn’t go as planned.  That just means we have to plan a trip back to Philly sooner than later so that we can experience a little more of what Philly has to offer.  Some of the highlights of the weekend were meeting some of the Philadelphia 76ers who were staying at the same hotel, experiencing a Philly Cheesesteak hoagie while actually being in Philly, and being able to introduce PB and the cubs to one of my best friends from high school, Ginny, who I hadn’t seen since we left high school.  She was the hit of the weekend with the cubs because she took us to a park nearby with plenty of running space and a playground.  It was just what they needed after being cramped up in a hotel room for a few days.  Leave it to me to forget the camera, though!  I did get a few shots at the banquet on Saturday night.

On Sunday afternoon, I had the privilege of “charging” my sister.  I cannot actually explain very well what this means excpet to say that I was to give her well wishes/blessings/words of wisdom as she takes on this new role of being the wife of a pastor.  Knowing that I had NEVER done anything like this before, common sense should have told me to write something down.  But, nooooo!  I had some ideas of what I wanted to say, so I thought I’d just wing it.  While trying to get through my little speech without crying, it quickly became too emotional and I ended up threatening the whole church!  My sentence went something like, “My sisters and I are all 5 feet and under, but we will turn Berean Baptist upside down if anyone messes with my sister or nephew.”  What??!!  Immediately, I hugged my sister and apologized for getting too personal.  I definitely caught myself ( as well as most people in the church that day) off guard, but I couldn’t get that statement back.  Has that ever happened to you?  I know I’ve said things in the past that may have hurt someone and unfortunately, it can take years to get that person to believe you are truly sorry for what you’ve said.  Proverbs 21:23 says “Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”  I know this all too well!  My point is – I’m not perfect and never will be just like you’re not perfect and never will be.  But, we can all work towards being better and making wise choices about what we say to others and how we want to say it.

Sharing my thoughts with my sister.

Peace and Blessings!


17 thoughts on “Tame That Tongue!”

  1. Straight from the “hood”. Who is surprised?! We girls who are born in July are not to be played with!!! Seriously though– a heartfelt and for real charge. Yes, there is protocol..but its sometimes refreshing to get away from the script and it’s also refreshing to admit when we may have crossed the line a little bit. Stay strong in who you are girl–I got yo’ back!!!!

  2. Remember in scripture when Jesus turned over the tables when people attempted to turn His Father’s house into a place of wickedness and worldliness. His response shocked people and offended people. Yet it was very necessary. Everybody in the “house” ain’t family and some only come with motives to tear down, defame and destroy and sometimes it takes a strong message of what should not, can not and will not be tolerated in God’s house. Like Jesus response in the temple that day, the message that you uttered was unexpected. Especially from you. But necessary!!!! You were asked to charge your sister, the new 1st lady at Berean and a brand new 1st Lady. And you did. You charged her to know that no matter what she is loved and protected spiritually and physically. You also warned and prophetic warning is never well received (especially by those who know the message is for them). I just have a feeling God is going to use you in a lot of “unexpected” and “radical” ways.

    So my lil’ sista, all you told them in proper and acceptable first lady speak is, “We are a close and loving family who takes care of each other. Church, please take care of my sister and nephew because we will not tolerate it and neither will God!”
    Love ya’ Girlie!!

  3. Hello, first I’ll start with the word “accountability”, something that is NOT practice in the church’s or families today. But before that let me first say I disagree with anyone that tells a person never to apologize for their tongue. As Christians not CHURCHFOLKS, God tells us to season our words, HE also gives instructions about our tongues (some are in James, 1 Peter). I’m sure and I hope, because none of us knows what in anyones heart. I am not passing judgement on you or anyone else, because I know, OH so well how it feels to be judged incorrectly, this is a familiar place for me. So, as a sister friend, in Christ, I place the charge of “Accountability” on you and if it’s in your heart COME and cleanup your statement.
    With much love for you,

    1. When I hear the word accountability, I think about responsibility. When we find oursleves in a situation where we have hurt someone because of what we have said, it is our responsibility to address it, if needed. Thanks for sharing!

  4. Ditto on Karen’s reply. You got me all teared up as well. You may be our “First Lady”, Pastor Kay’s wife, the cubs Mommy. Before all of that you were and will always be Jay’s sister. But at the end of the day you’re still you. Don’t ever apologize for your tongue. What you gave was spontaneous and from the heart and exactly what God wanted you to say.

    1. Thanks, Doris. If I ever have the opportunity to charge another First Lady I’ll be sure to choose my words more wisely. Some were offended, and some were not, I’m sure. My point was to let them know that Jay and Trey were off-limits. Am I sorry for what I said? No! I just could have said it in a different way.

  5. I knew exactly what you were saying and I have to commend you on your words every word came from the heart and I know the people of Berean didn’t take it personal. You was in the “moment” and you let all of us know that it was nothing but “LOVE”. I was tearing up myself. There’s nothing like “FAMILY”. Kudos to you sister…Love Ya!!!!

    1. I don’t think anyone took it personally either, but I really should’ve saved it for a conversation just between Jay and I. Thanks for understanding, though!

  6. You wear many different hats. Christian, Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, and First Lady. You are also a human being. Everyone says and does things that may not always be appropriate at that particular time. We just pray and ask God to help us say and do what his will calls for us to do. We ask that if we hurt someone it be charged to our head and not our hearts. You have a warm spirit and beautiful heart. Who knows what you said may just as well needed to be heard.

  7. What a joy to share this calling with your sister. Also loved the choir pictures of you and your choir sisters. Blessings as you serve in so many ways.

  8. I know you made PB happy with the comment about you and your sisters turning the church upside down….LOL!!!!

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